Gaining Momentum~

“Painting is self-discovery. Every good artist paints what he [she] is.” ~ Jackson Pollock

No More Just Grinding Gears

So, this has been a productive week for me.

After many weeks of stagnating on my thesis and being unable to bring myself to really write much of anything, I flew through writing almost 20 pages of content. I’ve now got several sections done and only a few more to go. That’s not to say those remaining sections will be a breeze but I’m proud of what I managed to accomplish this week. I hope this momentum continues.

This week, I focused mainly on finishing the section of my paper exploring inspirational Elit pieces for my own work and on starting and completing the digital art section. As of this morning, both can be checked off my to-do list. It’s funny. Once I re-framed what I wanted to focus on–my inspirations rather than trying to make some grand statement–the words came easily. It was like everything I had been thinking about over these past few months was finally given the go-ahead. More, I feel like I’ve got my groove back.

I feel revitalized and a bit rejuvenated. Now that some burdens are no longer weighing me down, I feel like I can finally focus on what’s important to me again. Which, right now, is my writing. It’s my project, my thesis. This subject is something I’ve been thinking about for a few years now and it’s something that genuinely interests me, makes me curious, and motivates me to what to discover and explore. It’s so frustrating that my curiosity and my motivation was tampered down for as long as it was.

It’s even more frustrating that my voice at all was silenced. Like, I believe my work is important and fascinating and that it speaks to a sociocultural shift that is occurring right now and that should be documented. Even if that weren’t true, this tome is important to me. That should be enough.

I’m hoping to move forward at a steady pace from here on out. My goal is to complete the written part of my thesis by spring break, which is the second week of March. That’s about five weeks away. I have about five remaining sections to write. If I complete a section a week, I should meet my goal. I’m pretty confident that this is a goal I can meet barring any unforeseen circumstances. It would remove a lot of stress from my life as well if I did complete this part of my thesis by then. I could focus on proofreading and on the installation aspect of my thesis.

It took until now, but I’m finally feeling like I have enough content to constitute a thesis. or most of this process, I have felt like my work has been fairly inadequate. Like, I’m never doing as much as I should be. Or, I’m not finding what I should be when I should be. It’s like I’ve been experiencing a grad-school-length-lag. I’m still concerned about finding and combing through more research to support my points. Also, I’m concerned, to an extent, about my thesis being too opinionated. But, these concerns are lee pressing to me than they have been. I feel like I can see the end result and it’s enough–for me, at least. I hope that’s enough for everyone else.

This is not an easy or straightforward process and it has been very hard to get even this far. There have been so many doubts, so many that have not made it to the blog. But, I feel like I have the momentum, no, to not only see the end but get to the end. I have a plan and a schedule I feel confident I can stick to. I have a renewed sense of direction. And, I have so much support from so many amazing, wonderful people who want to see me succeed. If anything, that’s the fuel that will keep this momentum going.

Thanks for everything always.

~Till next time~

Making A Comeback

So….

I’m back.

And, I’m not going to lie, I took a major break from working on my thesis over our winter recess. Some things in my personal life were really affecting me deeply and keeping me from feeling inspired or motivated to work–despite loving my subject matter. I’m not trying to make any excuses, just state reality. I was unable to find the inspiration to work for most of my break. There were many late nights spent up trying so hard to work and finding nothing but frustration and, I’ll admit, some tears. It’s not that I didn’t want to work; I couldn’t.

Towards the end of winter recess, I did begin writing some more and completing two additional sections of my thesis. I think they could be “bulked up” some but, overall, they have thoughtful ideas in them and a focus. Thinking about my thesis as more of a map of my own thinking and mapping for this project has helped me generate content. I’m less worried about making some grand statement or about impressing anyone and more concerned with making my project make sense to others. I want my own thinking to be center stage. I believe it is my perspective that makes this work compelling. More, I want to write my thesis in my own voice and with my own words. I don’t want to use recycled, academic jargon. I don’t want to be a part of some academic circle-jerk.

In this process, I’ve been really thinking about Hugo Ball’s quote, “This humiliating age has not succeeded in winning our respect” and how I want to convey that kind of tenacity and courageous belligerence through my work. Ultimately, I think it is the courageous and rebellious spirit of Dadaism and new forms of digital content creation that resonates with me and, I believe, with others. That’s a large part of where the connection lies. These emergent, digital expressions like Eliterature, memes, shitposting, etc. are our responses to the utter bullshit the world has become in so many ways. This is how we sass the powers that be. This is how we snark. How we rebel. How we drag the powers that be back down into the dirt and dust they left us in and remind them that we are still here and those powers that be have NOT earned a speck of our respect. Perhaps its pathological but it’s definitely ideological.

The more I read and the more I think about this subject matter the more compelled I am to believe that this is a revolutionary shift in thinking and in creating. Online spaces and the digital realm have provided us with so much opportunity and resource to unionize. Ideas are powerful in these spaces. They can have real world impact. I think it is so important now more than ever to understand that and to want to understand how. That’s what I feel like I am doing with my work. More, it feels like I’m trying to develop this new analytical lens to look at content like this because, quite frankly, I think our traditional lenses are antiquated and not super suited to do this job. I hope that by combining a literary lens with an art historical one, there can be new understanding. There can be a new recognition and appreciation of meaning.

So often, new forms of creating are dismissed for not being “meaningful” enough. Especially content like memes and gifs and shitposting–they’re all discounted and dismissed as being another meaningless aspect of Millennial culture. It’s insulting. Also, it’s ignorant and negligent and seems to be the powers that be trying desperately to neutralize a challenge to their power. Trying to stave off a challenge to the establishment.

But, I don’t think it’s working. And, I think those powers know that.

New forms of content creation are how we communicate with each other now. They are how we express our feelings of pride and contempt. They have become conduits , deeply embedded with rich and diverse meaning. If they seem like challenges to the powers that be, that’s because they are. These symbols say “we know what’s going on”. They say “we know and f*ck you for thinking we wouldn’t”.

Maybe I’m projecting some of my own feelings onto this medium but I think that, if even half of what I’m saying applies to this subject, then that is noteworthy and it is sure as hell meaningful.

I was beaten down at the beginning of this break but, after everything and remembering Hugo Ball’s words, I’m back up on my feet and ready to take some swings at the establishment. I’m ready to fight back. Bite back. I’m pissed that I let anything stop me from doing what I love to do–writing and calling out assh*les for being assh*les. For only seeing garbage where’s there’s solid gold.

Best believe I’m making a comeback and coming for the crown.

This humiliating age has not succeeded in winning my respect. That’s for damn sure.

****

Down nine times but I get up ten.

~Till next time~

Combing Slowly but Surely Through the Internet Archives…

I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving break (if you celebrate the holiday)! I celebrated by eating some turkey with the fam before getting back to work on this thesis it’s not going to write itself apparently.

Me over break 

Assembling my Thesis Proposal

So, since we last spoke, this girl has been hard at work on her thesis proposal! I have been digging through the EBR and New Horizons for thoughts and information on self-representation in the digital age as well as travelling the far reaches of the Internet for any and all research exploring the connection between new forms of digital content creation and Dadaism. The results of these long hours of research are a fairly developed annotated bibliography as well as a half-completed-ish proposal. I know, in my last post, I stated that I wanted to have a rough draft of my proposal completed during break. That may have been a bit overly ambitious. That said, while I acknowledge that I did not totally reach my intended goal, I believe I accomplished a lot of necessary work. Being able to focus on the research, also, helped renew my vigor.

I found many interesting articles drawing comparisons between new forms of digital content creation such as memes, shitposting, etc. and a reemergence of Dadaism in the twenty-first century. While not wholly academic articles, compelling points were made in them for viewing these new digital artifacts as representative of the Millennial sense of self and reality. Articles and posts by Megan Hoins, Charlie Scanlan, and Deirdre Olsen make a case for memes operating as a kind of lens through which the Millennial generation can view themselves as well as make sense of reality. Memes are essentially a response to the chaos and disorder that seems to have swept across the globe. If memes are nonsensical and nihilistic, it is because the world is nonsensical and nihilistic. Memes have become a new form of communication, have become the new mouthpiece of a generation that is sick of being silenced/having no say. More, they are becoming an essential part of the new self-portrait.

Further research by Shivani Gorle compares memes and shitposting to the rise of a so-called “Neo-Neo-Dadaism”. Gorle identifies these mediums as a contemporary kind of expression of Hugo Ball’s “this humiliating age has not succeeded in winning our respect” sentiment. These new digital forms of content creation are thus an emergent form of counter-art and counter-culture. Memes and shitposting, then, are how we as a generation respond to our world but are also the means through which we dismantle established logic and ideologies and so assert our own sense of self over our circumstances. It’s quite an interesting and compelling notion and one I definitely want to see represented in my own work. This kind of research is really getting at the heart of what I believe about new digital forms of content creation–that they are representative of a new kind of concept of the self. They contribute to the construction of an identity that is ideologically different than the processes of identity construction of the past, that occurred without media-intervention. Memes and shitposting and the like represent a kind of disillusionment with and fragmentation of the self that seems evolved from earlier conceptions of identity. At least, that is what I believe and hope to explore through my work.

Additional research on Elit found an interesting article on personal narrative and self-representation written by Dr. Ruth Page. In her research, Page discusses how the capabilities/affordances of Elit allow for an exploration of personal narrative that is not better than traditional literary forms but that is wholly different. Page states, “The medium-specific properties of electronic narratives aptly underscore the fragmentary nature of self representation, as the pixels on a flickering screen and the potential decay of hyperlinks give the lie to the illusion of textual permanence conferred by the printed page”. Essentially, the design of an Elit work can reinforce its themes. This is something that can be seen in works like Nelson’s This is How You Will Die, Davis’ Pieces of Herself and Ankerson and Sapnar’s Cruising. All of these works make use of interfaces that reinforce their themes or that reference some conceptual underpinning or underlying ideology. 

Overall, I think I’m making good progress with the literature. I feel like I have more of a grasp of my subject matter as well as a renewed focus, having read through research that explores similar ideas to my own. It is important, now, I think to explore some of the research counter to or different from my ideas. I will be working on incorporating that information into my draft this week as well as continue working on assembling my proposal. I have some questions about my introduction that I hope I will be able to go over in class this week. Mainly, I want to know if I’m going “in the right direction” so to speak. Since my work is a little more on the “creative” side, I’m not entirely sure what tone to take with my work. (I need to know how much of my style, let’s call it, can come through ^.^)

Speaking of style, I have also been working on the prototype of my Elit piece! Mostly, I’m working on adding textual information into the work right now as well as some hyperlinks. This weekend, I’m hoping to experiment a little more with incorporating audio into the work. I have some soundbites I would like to work into the piece. Some of these soundbites are more, shall we say, aesthetic in nature but some are more connected to the actual text or history, like Hugo Ball’s sound poems (examples 1 & 2).

Anyway, I will keep you updated on my progress! I’m hoping to have a workable thesis proposal as well as prototype of my accompanying Elit piece by the end of the semester!

****

~Till next time~

Short & Sweet (and #Suffering)

(Another brief update sorry)

So, this week, I have continued to read through the research surrounding my thesis topic. I’m still working on creating a developed and well-rounded annotated bibliography. To be honest, I think I need to focus more on the research aspect of my project. I have done a lot of research so far for my independent study (which is thesis adjacent) but, I definitely feel like I need to put more work into reading through sources for my thesis proper. I am finding that a lot of the sources in the Electronic Book Review are often specific to one work of Eliterature or to one rather specific, niche topic which is making culling research from the site slow-going. I am planning to look through Google Scholar and the library’s databases to see if I can find more articles that provide an overview of Eliterature and important, broader aspects of this emergent genre. (I have come across a lot of sources critiquing the genre, which ten to lead to other sources analyzing key aspects of it–which has been helpful. I still feel like I’m not finding the best sources though.)

As for the design and concept aspect of my thesis project, that’s going great. I was really nervous about developing a kind of prototype of my Elit piece. But, this week, I came across some programs that I think can help me assemble a decent prototype of my vision. Two of the programs I am really liking right now are PicMonkey and Thinglink. The former has proven to be a useful and very easy-to-use photo-editing tool while the latter shows promise for assisting me in creating a kind of hyperlink work. (Actually, I came across Thinglink while working on a training module just last week for my one of my jobs ^.^) Neither offers me the exact kind of functionality I want out of my final work but I think they provide me with a good starting point and a great place to “springboard” from. Like, I feel like I’m making some good progress with these programs. Last week, I wasn’t sure how any of the pieces I’ve been working on were going to come together. This week, I can see the pieces falling into place.

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*Here’s a sneak peek of what I’ve been working on~*

Anyway, I think I’m going to shift gears and focus more on the research specifically for my thesis. I’m hoping to complete my annotated bibliography before Thanksgiving so that I can work on writing a rough draft of my proposal over that extended break time. During break, I’m also planning to wrap up the prototype for my Elit piece.

Wish me luck~

~Till next time~

Trudging Through… #Suffering

Putting in the Work 

This week, I was tasked with starting my actual thesis proposal. A daunting task, let me tell you. Not because I’ve never written a research/thesis proposal but because I did not realize how much content I would have to comb through in order to assemble this monstrosity.

Me this past week >.<

Currently, I am in the process of developing my annotated bibliography. Thus far, I’ve reviewed work by Scott Rettburg, Katherine Hayles, Illya Szilak, among others. I have so much more reading to do, though. I still need to include information on inspiring Elit pieces and digital art. Hopefully, by the time of our next class meeting, I will have that information incorporated into my annotated bibliography. When paired with everything that has been going on in my personal life as of recently, this project and its scope is just a bit overwhelming. I’m used to being “on top” of tasks and being able to keep to a strict schedule but, lately, I just have not been able to keep that usual standard–which is incredibly frustrating to me.

I am trying to focus on moving at my own pace, though. I’m trying to appreciate what work I can get done–even if it is not necessarily the amount of work I had hoped to get done. The research I am finding on the Electronic Book Review site is, at least, relevant and interesting. In fact, I am finding quite a few articles exploring the artistic implications of Elit and new forms of digital content creation. Much of the research on this site, though, is concerned with the functions of Elit and the future of the genre. I’m trying to comb through information as best I can and in as timely a manner as I can. I may need until Thanksgiving break to develop a completed draft of my proposal. After then, I would like to focus on revision.

I feel slightly lucky that I have a fairly extensive annotated bibliography on new forms of digital content creation, like memes, that I have been developing in my additional independent study course. The information in that document may prove to be useful to my research when it comes to discussing self-representation and communication of the self in online spaces. Much of the research surrounding mimetics deals with the evolution of communication as well as with how online and digital spaces provide new affordances for expression of the self. I feel like this information is relevant to my own inquiries. Specifically, I think research by Shifman, Davison, Cannizzaro, Rintel, French, and many others may be applicable to my research.

Also, having a fairly fleshed-out concept for the Elit design and installation aspect of my work makes me feel slightly better about being behind in my reading. Writing my latest post on my other blog really encouraged me to keep going with my own research. I feel so…. honored(?) to be able to explore this line of inquiries. Because I am so invested in and inspired by my own topic, I feel blessed, in a way. I’m more encouraged to continue working on a project that I am looking forward to seeing realized.

*Finally pulled out the ol’ charcoal and sketch pad and got to drawing my design for my Elit work out~

Anyway, that’s this week’s progress update–I am bogged down in the research, trudging slowly but surely through it. I am planning to have a completed research proposal by the end of the month, if not sooner. Additionally, I should have a prototype for the Elit aspect of my work completed by the end of the semester. I’m not sure if I’m on the right path, time-wise, but I’m definitely moving and I feel like I’m making progress.

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~Till next time~

Update on My Progress

This is going to be brief but I hope that’s okay ^.^

So, this week, our cozy little thesis cohort was able to confer with each other about our work. This was a nice change of pace and I know I found it helpful to see what other people were doing for their thesis. Being earlier on in my thesis, it helped me better conceptualize my process by seeing where others were in their work.

Working with Katherine, especially, I found to be helpful as we are both attempting to approach unorthodox subject matter in creative, innovative ways. I enjoyed the tone and voice of Katherine’s work as well as the incorporation of personal experience. She revealed that this was a recent change and that she found it more comfortable to write in this voice. As a reader, I appreciated being able to hear her voice and thought it brought a personal dimension to her research that was absent before but certainly necessary. I’m excited to see where Katherine’s work will go from here!

Also, I’m excited to see where my own work will go from here. Katherine’s feedback on my little work so far was insightful and helpful. Katherine thought what I had so far in terms of a lit review was a good start. She thought the tone and subject matter matched. It was, also, easier to understand what I was discussing. That said, Katherine did mention I might want to include more information about the art perspective on digital content creation I want to use. Katherine recognized that that explanation may come further into the research, of course, but she did mention that it seemed to be something missing. This observation is, actually, similar to one I made about Katherine’s work. What she has written thus far seems to imply that she will be making a connection to mental health and art therapy but her research has yet to include that aspect. Similarly, my work mentions incorporating an art historical perspective but it has yet to explain its relevance nor any correlation to contemporary digital content creation. It’s on the list believe me.

Anyway, I think it was overall helpful to have this conversation with Katherine and the rest of our thesis cohort. Stephanie and Hope also provided me with some of their thoughts on my work. Mainly, they found it interesting but it definitely still needs some development (which, duh).

I look forward to working more closely with my fellow thesis writers! It’s helpful to have so many different perspectives to hear from!

****

~Till next time~

Digging Deeper~

So….

This week has been productive in a few different ways. Mainly, I started digging into the literature surrounding aspects of Elit and digital art and content creation I’m interested in. I found an interesting article discussing the canonization of article by Scott Rettberg as well a fascinating article by Katherine Hayles about viewing Elit works as these kinds of cognitive assemblages. I’m still just delving into the literature and assembling a kind of annotated bibliography of sources, though. If anyone has any recommendations for good sources discussing Eliterature and its functions and literary value, please hmu! Also, I’m looking for any recs for informative sources about digital art or theories behind it!

In addition to delving more into the literature, I also dove deeper into my concept. As regular readers of my posts may know, I’ve been struggling with my concept. I have a lot of ideas surrounding what I would like to create but not such a clear idea of exactly what I want to make. There’s just all these pieces but no cohesive whole.

Last week, I dabbled with the idea of the “drag-n-drop” interface. The design and concept of Juliet Davis’ Pieces of Herself had a very large impact on me, especially in the way it depicted ideas of self-representation and social inscription. Revisiting Porpentine’s With Those We Love Alive this past week also had a huge influence with me. Reading my own posts on the work reminded me of how deeply this work and its themes resonated with me. In one of my prior posts, I even mentioned wanting to create a work similar to it. Specifically, I found myself re-inspired by the language and poetic voice of the piece. I really want to be able to express my own poetic voice through any work of Elit I create.

My new vision for my work combines traditional Dada photomontage and assemblage aestheticism the concept of the Rogues Gallery with contemporary Millennial humor (as represented by memes and tweets, etc.) and the ideology behind Degenerate Art. I imagine this work will open with a silhouette that is covered in an amalgamation of different artifacts such as the first page of a Dada manifesto and an @dril tweet, a flyer for a Degenerate Art show and an Inappropriate Audition Songs meme.

In a kind of reverse of Davis’ work, readers would have to remove pieces from the silhouette in order to uncover/discover what they mean. Readers would move the artifacts to the blank space surrounding the silhouette. So, in the process of removing the pieces of photomontage from the silhouette, readers would be creating a new photomontage of the background. I would like for a string of lexia to pop up and explain the significance of the artifact once it has been placed outside of the silhouette. This lexia would contain information about the history of the artifact or about the origin of the content. I hope to include links to outside sources for readers to get more information.

As readers remove the artifacts from the silhouette, I want them to uncover a poem beneath. This is a poem I either want to write myself or I want to put through an algorithm like a bot to generate. Ultimately, I want it to reveal something about the mutability and evolution of self-representation and how aesthetic presentation connects to ideas of self-representation. How we are all made of pieces. How we are all collage. All assemblage, photomontage, bricollage, mosaic.

I would like the work to come to a “kind of end” by having all of the removed pieces return to the silhouette in a new pattern, reinforcing the idea that we are these kinds of collage, perhaps degenerate but still ultimately of so much value (as revealed by the information each artifact embodies). Because of this, this work would still be titled Degenerate’s Gallery.

As I imagine presenting this work during my university’s research days, I have also imagined an installation component to this piece. I would like a technological setup that allows readers to work through the piece. In addition to that, though, I would like to create a wire/metal bust of a head and shoulders and invite people to stick different kinds of artifacts to this bust, to participate in the creation of a work of degenerate art.

Ultimately, it is my hope that this work will allow participants to view themselves and acts of self-representation and aesthetic presentation through a new lens. Also, I would like my work to be a kind of meditation on Dada absurdism and nihilism and what it means that these ideologies and ideals are re-emerging through the ways we represent ourselves in online spaces.

Anyway, that’s what I’ve been thinking about this week. I would love any input from my fellow creators and researchers in the field. All of your guidance and suggestions have been very helpful. (I recently downloaded Krita and so far I am very impressed with the program. I want to lay around with the tools and watch a few more tutorials before I share some of my work.)

****

~Till next time~

….A Bit Unproductive

So….

This week I didn’t accomplish as many things as I had hoped. Largely, this was due to a sudden increase in my workload at my job.

Work this week~

Sigh. Life happens. It’s no excuse but I just wanted to explain upfront why this week’s post may be lacking some its usual zeal~

Anyway, back to our regularly scheduled program!

The Lowdown

So, this week, I spent a lot of time thinking about the design of my piece. I’m rather concerned about creating the work. Though I appreciate a lot of the sources Jason Nelson shared with me, they still come across as very daunting at first. Maybe I need to spend more time perusing them? This week, I was unfortunately unable to do more than skim the coding site Dr. Nelson shared with me. I’m interested in coding but I’m also interested in exploring maybe other avenues of creating a work with the kind of functionality I want. On Twitter, Stevan Živadinovic mentioned checking out Twine to see if I could make a prototype of what I’m looking for. I have some experience with Twine so I may want to experiment more with its functionality. Zivadinovic also mentioned that I might just have to “bite the bullet” and dive into Unity. As Dr. Nelson also recommended Unity, I’m thinking I may have to really bite that bullet.

That said, I’ve reached out to some of my friends in the digital arts about what programs they recommend. I want to incorporate some of my own drawings and, maybe, even metalworks into this project. I’m waiting to hear back from these friends about what they recommend. Honestly, I want to see how much I can make in a program like Photoshop or Krita or, for audio, Protools or Audacity, before I have to delve into other sources.

As for the structure of the work I want to create, I’ve had some thoughts. This week, in another course, I looked into Juliet Davis’ Pieces of Herself. It’s a very powerful and compelling work of Elit that impacted me greatly. Both the work’s design and content really struck me. I love the superimposition of elements in the piece and how that technique can be used to convey meaningful messages. It inspired me to think more deeply about the design components of my own work as well as the kind of message I want to convey about self-representation and aesthetic presentation in our current digital age.

While I like my initial concept of the shattered mirror, I wonder if it might be more apt for my work to be centered around a silhouette of a face, neck, and shoulders with a collage/photo-montage of different elements slathered across its face. Each of these elements would be clickable and would take the user to another screen. Some of the elements may be tweets or memes or a Dada manifesto or a snippet of poetry. Maybe, I want to make this work ore about the self-representation aspect? I was very moved by Davis’ work and I find myself very moved by works that revolve around the construction, negotiation, and navigation of identity and self. I find art to be an offshoot of self-presentation, so maybe that’s how that subject would tie into the work. Maybe I could have a screen of silhouettes, formatted like a rogues gallery or a board of wanted posters or something too??? I really think I want to delve into how involved digital content has become in the construction of the self. But, I don’t necessarily want to convey that that’s a bad thing. It’s just a change, a difference.

I love all of the research I’ve done so far into Dadaism and into new ways of identity construction through digital media but, maybe, I should make this work more personal? Perhaps use a silhouette of my face and mix in digital content with other creative works. Kind of use an individual example of the evolution of navigating the self to apply to a larger whole, to make a larger statement. Maybe I should focus on just conveying the ambivalence of navigating and negotiating self-representation??? I don’t know.

As you can see, I’ve had a hell of a week caught up in my thoughts. I could definitely use some guidance and, really, someone to bound ideas off of. Hopefully, this week, I can get a more solid grasp of what I want to create and begin researching ways to create it.

****

~Till next week~

Hammering Out the Details~

So….. before we get down to the nitty gritty, I want to announce an update to last week’s post:

JASON NELSON GOT BACK TO ME!!!!

I received a response to my inquiry I sent last week to Dr. Nelson wherein I asked him about his design and artistic processes. Also, I asked if he had any recommendations for how someone who doesn’t have a background in graphics or digital art (like me) could go about creating a work of Elit.

Side note: He was very excited that I wanted to get into Elit. Like, there were exclamation points and everything going on!!!! Heck yeah!!!

Anyway, Dr. Nelson provided me with an abundance of information about his creative process and how he approaches a new project. Also, he went into more detail about the differences between designing a work for the screen and designing an installation work. Largely, most of the difference revolves around audience and reach. Designing a work for an online space affords more access as it allows for a larger audience to interact with the work. An Elit piece for the screen can reach a global audience very quickly. Creating an installation work, though, can allow for a more intimate experience between the participant and the content. Not that an online work cannot be intimate–far from it. But, the intimacy is different. The experience is different. Neither one is better or worse. Neither experience should be diminished in comparison to the other. It’s just important to be aware of the differences in affordances each provides.

So, the kind of Elit work I want to create may be depend on the audience I am hoping to reach.

The question of audience is a difficult one in many ways. Because I want to explore self-representation and navigation self-representation in digital spaces, I think an Elit work that allows for more personal, one-on-one interaction would be most demonstrative of my points. But, because I believe aesthetic presentation intersects with this topic and provides interesting dimension to it, a work that presents itself almost as a kind of art exhibition/installation may be more illustrative of that aspect.

In many ways, I think I want to create a work that can be experienced through multiple modes. Like, it can be experienced on a screen or it can be experienced as an installation. I’m not yet sure how to make a work like that. More discussion with other artists and content creators may be necessary. I like the idea of creating a work that has additional components to it, though, based upon whether it is accessed via screen or installation.

In regards to creating this work, Dr. Nelson also provided me with some coding resources. There are many sites one can access in order to teach themselves how to code. Dr. Nelson shared this site with me in particular. Though not necessary, Dr. Nelson expressed that learning how to code can provide a digital artist with more creative freedom over their work and can provide more space to explore.

Also recommended to me were some game making programs such as Gamesalad, Construct2, Gamemaker, and, the hardest of the bunch, Unity. All of these are kinds of visual programming software. These programs can be used to make games or be used to create creatures with more interactive functionality. The first 3 programs cost money, though, and Unity, though free, can be challenging to learn how to use. I believe I have to explore some of these programs before I can really discuss more about their affordances. Dr. Nelson recommended I research some YouTube tutorials on the programs. For many of these programs, luckily, there exists an abundance of online tutorials. This is reassuring and makes tackling any one of these programs seem a little less intimidating/ daunting.

All in all, Dr. Nelson gave me a lot of good advice about how to approach a digital project as well as provided me with a lot of resources (I did not know about before) to consider. I Again, though, I think I need to do more tinkering with these programs to decide which one would work best for my project. I look forward to continuing my correspondence with Dr. Nelson and learning whatever he has to teach me about Elit and about creating digital art and content.

Designing the Degenerates Gallery

This week, I continued to work on my concept and design for my Degenerates Gallery. As mentioned before, I want my work to invite readers to explore the mutability and trans formative nature of self-representation and aesthetic presentation in the digital age. In many ways, I want this work to be art. To be poetry. I don’t want it to be a lesson. I don’t want it to be a warning. I think self-representation and aesthetic presentation have definitely changed with the onset of online intervention. In many ways, both have become more complicated to navigate. But, I don’t think either have been diminished. Again, I believe there is meaning in exploring differences as differences rather than as diminshments.

Anyway, as discussed in my last post, I imagine this work to be one that is entered through a kind of shattered mirror/screen. I would like for selfies or other portrait-type pictures to flash across the mirror/screen. In between flashes of faces, I imagine a kind of television static or “glitch” type of graphic (if possible). Here is the mirror I drew (it’s from an old drawing):

I put a filter on it to cool down the tone of the drawing. This mirror has some personal significance to me as it is the mirror I use to put on my face every morning. I like that added level of complexity, though I’m not sure if it will come into play at any point in the actual work.

In order to “shatter” this mirror/screen, so to speak, I used my laptop to just drawn some jagged lines across the picture. I imagine each piece of the mirror will be more separated and, possibly, the piece will be floating across the space of the screen. I’m not sure yet if I want to do that or if it would be just as meaning to have the mirror shattered but still holding its shape as pictured below:

This came out better than expected, tbh~

Again, across the mirror/screen, I would like to have selfies or self-portraits flashing. I think I need more advanced tools, even just basic Photoshop, to illustrate my vision but I did try to create a sample of what I am envisioning (don’t laugh):

Layered Mirror and Face

It’s just a sample of what I’m hoping to create. I want to fit the selfies more to the size of the mirror/screen. Also, I think it might be worthwhile to put the selfies through a kind of filtering program like Lunapic Pixelate Effect or the ACSII Art camera. (Both are sources I was introduced to through @cogdog Prof Alan Levine’s Daily Digital Alchemy exercises ^.^ Thanks Alan!) Putting the pictures through a filter beforehand may eliminate the need to code some kind of glitch/static affect. It’s something to consider, at least.

I really like Stevan Živadinovic’s approach to incorporating art into an Elit piece as well. For Hobo Lobo of Hamelin, he drew out the images and characters on paper before editing them online and incorporating them into the work. With my background in studio art, I think an approach like this might work best for me. Again, I think I need to invest in an image-editing program like Photoshop, in order to make this work. The end result might be really compelling.

As for how this work would operate/how users would navigate it, I want each shard of the shattered mirror/screen to take readers to another window. Each window should illustrate some different facet of self-representation or aesthetic presentation in the digital age. I imagine one shard would lead to an archive of reference sources–such as links to other artists or their work, links to memes or meme formats, links to tweets, links to manifestos, etc. This part of the work I imagine to operate somewhat like the archive section from Illya Szilak’s Reconstructing Mayakovsky. Another shard, I imagine to take users to an infinitely black screen. Once the screen has loaded, the screaming will start. This is meant to be a play off the popular internet meme/slang of “screaming into the void”. In many ways, this meme would operate in my work as a form of contemporary performative Dadaism. This part of my work is inspired heavily by Hugo Ball and the shows he would put on. He was all about sound poetry and decontextualizing sound.

Another shard, I want to lead readers to a screen that will display a kind of infinite stream of text, similar to Taroko Gorge and its many remixes. I want the text to be a mixture of Dada manifestos and tweets from popular, nonsensical/nihilistic accounts like @dril.

I mean, this is Dada gold

I still need to think about where some of the other shards should go. I want there to be an interactive component to this work. I’m just not sure what it would be. Somehow, I want readers to be able to construct a representation of themselves from the work. I’m not sure how best to go about that yet.

Also, I want to incorporate my own voice into this piece. I want the language of the work to be poetic and, perhaps, a bit sardonic or parodic (like Jason Nelson’s voice in works like This is how you will die and Game, game, game, and again game.)

Ultimately, I hope to make this work one that reveals how seemingly nonsensical forms of self-expression are still meaningful if for no other reason than they create who you are. They tell a story of how you navigate the self and the world. More, I think this trend towards absurdity and nihilism in contemporary representations of the self reveal something deeper about the human condition, about how we are currently coping with the state of our societies and culture. Particularly in the western world, I think these trends reveal some deep truths about how we are not coping–with anything. In a world that is so deeply flawed, how can our expressions of self not be? How can we not all be rogues? Not all be degenerates?

Though I definitely still have a lot of work ahead of me, I think the work I’ve done thus far has provided me with some good direction. I feel more grounded in my ideas. Dr. Nelson’s support, too, also gives me some confidence. Creating this work feels a little less daunting with support.

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~Till next time~

Degenerates Gallery~

Disclaimer

So….. this week I was tasked with reaching out to some digital content creators that inspired me. Through discussion with them, I hoped to glean more about their creative process as well as get some guidance on how to approach a larger digital project. Being that I only have a background in studio art, this advice would be helpful in providing me with some direction for broaching not just my own project, but the concept behind it.

At the time of writing this post, I have yet to hear back from those I emailed. (Fingers crossed, though~)

Regardless, I have spent this week thinking more deeply about the kind of project I would like to make for my thesis. Specifically, I’ve been reflecting on the work and projects I’ve made thus far as well as on the projects I want to work on. This reflection led me to create 2 lists: A list of 8 things I’ve made that I love and a list of 4 things I would like to make.

8 Things I’ve Made That I Love

1. Sweet Screams…. I made this nightmare catcher about a year ago. I was heavily inspired by some bones I received from a friend. It got me thinking about how to display them. Also, I had been wanting to work on a larger metals project for a while. I made this work during a time of great inspiration. I remember feeling the power of my own concept as I worked on this piece. I love the idea of corrupting faerie tales/faerie tale objects. There’s something about challenging traditionalism that really motivates me.
2. Bone Girl… I wrote this story a little over a year ago as well. It was inspired by a random twitter bot prompt but really became something unique unto itself. I have created several other works that are heavily influenced by this piece. I’ve also narrated the story myself (with sound effects) as well as created a slide-show display of sorts for the piece (complete with images). It’s a dark twist of a tale, about a mother and daughter and the rituals they share.
3. Ungentle Into the Night is a story that started off as another story inspired by a bot prompt on my blog titled Living Dead Girl. It became a series consisting of 4 installments (II, III, IV). I continued writing the story for a class on writing fiction for young adults and it became a 30 page work. It’s a story about a necromancer, Thana, and a reaper, Hayden, working together to set an underworld out of whack back into whack. It was the first longer, creative work I had written in a long time. I hope to finish writing it one day.
4.  Iscariagor… Is a piece of piece of jewelry I made about a year ago as well. It’s a necklace that I cut out, shaped, and enameled to look like blood splatter. I came up with the name for the piece by combining the words Iscariot, ichor, and gore. I envisioned this necklace was commissioned by a queen who demanded a piece of jewelry be made from the blood of traitors. Charming, yeah?
5. Supply… This is the title of a collection of poetry I wrote last semester. It was inspired by a relationship with someone I really loved and who I really miss now. I wanted to immortalize us and the loved we shared, however short, in the most meaningful way I could: through writing. It’s some of the most personal writing I’ve done in a long time. Here’s one of the poems from the collection I really love:
6. Two-Faced…. Inspired by my poetry collection, Supply, I also made a work in metals. This piece is made from two pieces of acrylic, one black and one red, both cut in the shape of my head in profile. On each is a poem I chased into a piece of metal and then cut out and riveted on to it corresponding acrylic piece. On the black and blue side is a more sad poem while on the bright red and orange side is a passionate poem.
7. Recently, my mom and I have been attending free arts & crafts classes at our public library. In those classes, we have had a chance to do pysanky (Ukrainian egg decorating) and rock painting. I’m really happy with both works I made in these workshops.
8. Silence Screams Weren’t Always…. This is the Elit piece I made a few years back in my first ever class about Eliterature. I made the work in PowerPoint and I was very proud of the final product. It was meant to be this immersive experience that allowed readers to explore the often decontextualized and cyclical nature of trauma. I wish I could share it with you but it, unfortunately, only exists as a download.

Honorable Mentions

• Nox Siog… This is the first bot I ever made! It tweets out little disturbing/poetic messages throughout the day. I love how the aesthetic and text of this bot work together. I wonder if it’s inspired anybody else to write….
• Moonie Girl…. More like Mooning Girl This is the first bot I made using the Markov text generator option on Dr. Zach Whalen’s spreadsheet that I use to create my bots. This bot tweets out messages pieced together from my poetry collection, Supply.

4 Things I Want To Make

1. Banshee Wind Chime…. A wind chime made from rib bones, silent until it announces your death only to your ears~
2. You should see me in a crown…. This is a crown/headdress/kokoshnik largely inspired by the song You should see me in a crown by Billie Eilish as well as by my own desire to be a queen. Since you decided not to treat me like a princess, I decided to make myself a queen. I’m currently working on making it a reality in metals this semester~
3. Treachery… This is an old story I wrote a while back about a dark faerie world. I want to edit it and continue working on it. I want this to be a series of work eventually, consisting of many different tales of the lives of many different characters that got me through some of the toughest times of my life~
4. Degenerates Gallery…. This is the digital work I would like to try and make for my thesis. It is inspired by the Degenerate Art exhibition held by the Nazis during the war to disparage and diminish Dada art as well as by the idea of the Rogues Gallery. Essentially, it would be a work that would allow readers to explore the nature of self-representation in online spaces as well as explore the influence of Dada ideology on contemporary forms of aesthetic and self-representation. I imagine the work to be a kind of Elit piece.

Imagining the Gallery

In my head, I imagine the first sight users would see when they enter the Degenerates Gallery is a shattered mirror-like screen. (I kind of imagine the word WANTED flashing in the black background as well????) Shards would be littered across the screen but still spaced close enough apart that the user could see the shape of the mirror that once as. Across the shards, faces would flash in and out. Different faces (I hope I can gather from asking for volunteers on social media sites). In between these faces, there would be static, making the mirror both a mirror and a screen.

Clicking on a shard would take the user to a different page. Each page would allow the reader to explore some different facet of how we construct ourselves in online spaces/of how Dada has reemerged and how a Dada lens can help us navigate these new kinds of self-representation. I imagine one shard would take users to an archive of sorts, kind of like the one in Illya Szilack’s Reconstructing Mayakovsky. This archive would provide users with a collection of reference points which may assist them in further navigating the work. I would like another shard to take users to a dark screen, where a twitter post, maybe, about “screaming into the void” pops up before fading into black as a loud scream begins to sound. This would be a kind of reference to Hugo Ball’s… interesting approach to Dada performance art. (You can see why an archive of sorts may be necessary.)

I’d like to open the work up to submissions, as well. I imagine putting up flyers around campus and tweeting out about how I am “Now Accepting Submissions to the Degenerate Art 2.0 Exhibition!” I think it might be fun to contrast submissions to famous works of Dada art. This would be another shard.

Essentially, I want an exploration of each shard to eventually reveal a new whole. I want the seeming brokenness to yield to a new, compelling whole.

Again, I’m no one with a background in creating digital art. So, I’m not sure how much of what I’ve just described is possible. But, I think even creating something close to what I’ve described would allow for an enriching experience and exploration of how we navigate and understand ourselves and how we create and express ourselves in online spaces.

I hope I’ll hear back from some of the artists I wrote soon! So, I can move this piece off of the the want to list to the made list!

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~Till next time~